da yi ma. -.-

nabei. da yi ma is here today. wth...

-.-

gosh. i'm gonna be damn bloody moody already. =/

hahas. kidding.

i miss you baby.

days without you seems so hard to pass.
especially when knowing you're not in camp,
but somewhere out yet you're not with me.
told myself to be strong,
you'll be home soon.
but the missing is there,
killing my emotions, bit by bit.
miss your hugs.
miss your kisses.
miss your laughter.
miss your smiling faces.
miss your naughtiness.
miss your stupidities.
miss your silliness.
miss everything of you, baby..


and so, the ICians left shop at 7am and head for LTA this morning while i stayed behind and continued sleeping. -.- hahas. well, i'm tired eys. feel like going home after work to rest since tomorrow i'm working full shift. =x

two days since prince left. he called me yesterday when i was on my way to work and when i was skating at night, before he sleeps. well, it's not really nice to hear his voice cause it makes me miss him even more. :( sobs sobs. anyways, i just hope everything is smooth and well for him. and hopefully he take care of his wounds else they'll get infections. :(

ohh, that's about it. byebye. and, weather sucks.
*yawns~

emptiness. LTA.

prince left for thailand last night. went to send him off with eddy, marcus and steven. not feeling very upset though cause i'm kinda used to sending people off for trips. (: but when i was walking to the bus-stop with eddy an steven, i was telling eddy that i'm feeling lonely suddenly. and my heart felt so empty. :( hais. it's gonna next month till prince is back. =/

can't imagine how am i gonna survive without him this coming close to one month. -.- well, kinda feels very attached to him now. =x which makes me not able to be on my own. feels like i'm no longer as independent as i was, as i used to be when i was single.

was that suppose to be a good thing? =x

hmm, look at things on the brighter side. (: i've got so many things i wanna do! and probably i can do it without prince's presence. cause whenever he's around, i tend to spend almost every minute i can with him and the rest of my time, i spend on working etc. (: i'm a hardworking girl k! ^^ hahaha.

i wanna :

• suntan!
• club!
• drink!
• go out till late night!

but... but but.... i promised prince something. and when he's back, it'll be ready. ^^ of course i'll do it lahh! (:

yesterday i called dzul, my starbucks's store manager. talked to him about my work permit thing and he was asking me for help. for hari raya. 21 August just passed. if i'm still with the nice team over at starbucks, it'll be a year since i worked there. :( hais. i missed the coffee beans grindings and miss the strong aroma of coffee. missed my lamazocco. =/

i missed everything in starbucks. hais....

anyways, tomorrow we're going for a performance over at the new expressway at macritchie ( i don't know how to spell. =x ) it was an offer by LTA. ^^ team elite and some selected members are going. (: cool... but we ALL have to be in full gear! full gear = helmet, elbow, wrist and knee guards. it has been a long time since i last had full gear on. (: hahas. and after which i'll be back to shop to work and after work, we ALL will be going to happy pot for dinner and we're gonna catch the fireworks festival as well. (: i love IC. we always have so many programmes going on. it just won't get bored with them around. (: hahas.

talking about fireworks festival, last year i was there with prince. it was awesome! extremely awesome. and last year's was on prince's birthday. (: hahas. it was amazing how the fireworks actually go so well with the music. both blend in together like as if they're just side my side. damn cool! best fireworks i've ever seen! and it lasted for more than half an hour. so imagine, during national day, new year etc was just like, five minutes or a little more? and it cost already a bomb. what about fireworks festival? tsktsk. (: but fact is i can't deny that the fireworks are really something. there're so many varieties that we've never came across over the years. serious! (: you wanna watch? hahas. unless you're ICians, cause we book tables at happy pot, so we can actually sits there, enjoy our food and watching fireworks at the same time! woots! heaven! ^^ wonderful people, wonderful foods and wonderful scenery! (: tell me where else can you find all these wonderfuls! ^^

alrights, beside all these.. i wanna annouce something!

i.......


realise.......


my.......


stamina.......


is.......




much BETTER THAN I THOUGHT I WAS! -.-

cause wednesday we went for urban skating. a long night skate with prince before he fly off. (: journey was..

EAST COAST RINK - CHANGI VILLAGE - LOYANG - LOST IN SINGAPORE - PASIR RIS - TAMPINES - SIMEI - BEDOK - EAST COAST RINK. =/

it took us almost 6 hours to be back at east coast again. it took us only one hour fifteen minutes to be reach changi village. and we had nasi lemak there. ahaha. wilson came to find us and he was so happy with his chicken wings. LOL.

then we started playing slopes and we got lost at loyang area... -.- going round and round. so funny. it was fun, but super tiring. i can bet with you, not all girls can take this. and yes! i'm one of the strong girl! (: effect after which, feet cramp / blister. LOL! lucky mine was just cramps. sky got blister. LOL. hahahahaha. and sadly, prince fell. injured his hand and shoulder. ouchh. it looks damn painful already... so imagine... :( but well, as long as he had fun, that's good enough. ^^

alrights. i think that's all i wanna blog for today. ha. god knows who reads my blog. or maybe somehow certain people can't take facts/reality and will start to be a pussy/punjabi/punani and start complaining like some big fuck. well.. i don't care, really.

freedom of speech always exist. if you can't take it, then just leave this blog. alt + F4. (:

love the awesome people and hate the pussies... ^^

hahahas.

kat is being lame. LOL.

failed myself and team. =x

i've failed myself and the team. i'm sorry. =x but i've done what i can. so yeahs, no regrets. just feel that i could have done far better.

well, wasn't happy with that. but what can i do? and i believe a lot of people IS unhappy. not because they've lost or what. but because we felt unfair. yes, everyone say life's never fair. but we're trying to make it fairer for ourselves. yet there're little things here and there which make things so bloody unfair.

we don't organise the competition. we don't set the rules and regulations. we can't change the rules. we can't change no shit. wtf? well, in the first place, i didn't even sign that bloody paper. steven took my number tag on my behalf. well, then did i sign that piece of stupid ' contract '? like what lynnee said, that paper has got a meaning and there must be a use for it. it's not just a ' black and white ' paper. wth.

just imagine, next time, they organise a competition and we don't take part. they're just competing against SA and SE people. let's just look at the womens category, zhuzhu has always been a champion, a league champion. and if one day she doesn't take part in the competition anymore, and they took over her position, do you think that's call a win? or rather, was that even suppose to be a glory? fact is, zhuzhu didn't take part, that's why they won. and if zhuzhu did take part, will they even stand a chance to win? maybe i believe just that one girl can, not the rest. the rest can't even reach their team mate's standard. what more to say reach zhuzhu's?

this world is full of people, who are just born to make people's life miserable. ' you're not even first, why you so happy? ' fuck. at least people won something. you freaking got nothing wanna say people. somehow, the person who said this, was there just for 'show'. that's what i saw. cause it's not performing. neither did it really improve from the last time i saw it. ( * using ' it ' cause i don't wanna mention name or gender ) what it did was exactly what it does the last time i saw it in competition. how hilarious can it be tell me? self proclaiming to be good but actually nothing. actions speak louder than words. this is what i've always believe. and these people, are people whom i really called as ' miserable '. cause they don't know how to appreciate. don't know how to be a good person. don't know how to see other's good. thank god i'm not born like that. though my mouth is mean at times, but i do know how to appreciate others. and know how to spread my love around.

never mind. one day, just that one day. WE will make a come back. WE will win all. WE will be the ones standing on the platform, being announce as the winners. and wait till that day, i shall see the sore faces displayed by them. they'll never be up there forever. just you wait and see.

okays. i shall not blog so much already. it's just my opinions. i speak my mind. if you can't stand it or don't like it, the question goes back to ; WHY THE HELL YOU COME HERE IN THE FIRST PLACE? don't like, get the hell out of this blog.

remember this,

if you don't like me, i'd probably don't fucking like you either.

do not dismiss my warning else you'll regret. i'll make sure you do.


i love my team.
i love my ICians.
i love my friends.

others whom i don't love, can jolly well fuck off. cause you don't care, and i don't bother.

birthday big fuck?

fuck lahh. why must everyone treat their own birthday LIKE SOME BIG FUCK?

fuck it. it's not like the birth of king or queen.

hate it when someone is trying to be like some kinda big fuck for their birthday.

yes i know it's your birthday. but no need to freaking make it as though it's something HUGE! cause it's not.

it's not like it's the 18th or 21st birthday.

well, yes i'm moody.

tiredness + fucked up feeling = fucking moody.

and prince, you jolly well know i don't like you to be in any form of contacting that FUCKER who whacked my queen. fuck it. i don't even wanna see her. still tell her you're going my place tonight. I DON'T WANNA SEE THAT FUCKER AND HER FUCKER BOYFRIEND AT ALL.

if possible, don't even talk to them. they are bad influence.

seriously, i've never hated a person as much as them. the sight of them just turns my happy mood off and turning my bad mood on. they should just DIE!!!! two idiots. two morons. two fuckers. hate them to the core. if i could choose, i wouldn't want her as my sister, and i wouldn't want to meet both of them either. never ever planted as much hatred before. but they made me reach my hatred point.

and, weather sucks to the max. KNNCCB.

just one mistake.

and i'm moody.

it was just a report. yet it's so important.

i'm not usually like that. i hate it when i'm not going smoothly at work now. it makes me miss starbucks. it makes me feel coming into sales line is a wrong choice.

from someone who knows nothing about sales but only F&B. to someone who tried to struggle her way to learn about it, know about it and fully understand it. but i think i'm a failure at sales. maybe F&B suits me better. but.. i don't believe there're things that i can't do well. i don't believe i can only excel in F&B. i don't believe i can't do well for sales.

crap. this is fuck up.

i'm not in the right mood eys. feel like exploding. feel like venting my anger out. feel like doing things which are crazy. feel like punching someone.

my mood now, is just like the WHOLE WORLD owes me a living. darn fuck up i know. but fuck, i'm moody, didn't i mention?

and this is MY BLOG. i can't be fuck to bother about what others think about MY BLOG. don't like this blog, JOLLY WELL FUCKING HELL FUCK OFF FROM HERE CB! nobody ask you to come here and fucking kepo.

i need to cool down.

fuck. everything.

i'm so very sad. :(

micheal helped me reformated the laptop, with all my photos and music files transferred to his hard drive. but yet when i transfer it back to my laptop, i deleted the files PERMANENTLY, without checking if everything is transferred. :(

and now, i lost quite a lot of my photos. and i lost all my music files. :( that's the sadest. PHOTOS!!!!!!!! :(

and now, i've no mood to blog.

bye.

sometimes...

sometimes i just wish i could turn back time to when i was just a student. it'll be so much easier for me. i wish i'm going back to school. i wish i'm still studying. i envy people who's still studying now. their life so free..

not like working, you gotta fork out so much time and affords. be it in whatever industry you're working at. working just takes up a lot of time. working as part time still okay cause you can choose. but as a full timer, you get to choose nuts. -.- and that's the sickening part. =/

hais. wish is just a wish. it'll never be true if i don't plan and do it. life sucks eys. -.-

anyways, good luck to those who's taking part in the competition, SNFC i mean. has. i don't pin high hopes, but i'll do my best. after all, i'm old already. time to let those young kids take over. their pride and ego very high, everything also much win. old birds like me can just sit one side and watch already. haha.

how time flies. now my main concern is not the competition actually. for that stupid competition falls on my prince's birthday. so i'm thinking what should i get for him. -.- i think i shouldn't buy him anything. cause he didn't buy me any on mine. =/ HAHA. craps. i think he don't deserve a present from me lehhs. -.- always piss me off and make me so unhappy. plus my birthday he also never buy me anything. -.- hmmmmmmmmmmmmm.......................

and also, he's flying off to thailand for his training in a week's time. next thursday is his flight. =x good luck darl. i'll take care of myself. you have fun there eys. (: LOL. i'll be good and be naughty at the same time when you're away k. HAHA. no lahhs. i'll be a good girl. ^^

and, to that person who sort of gave a warning that day. reporting your guy's whereabouts is not my duty. getting permission to enter his house is also not from you but his mom. you made it sounds as though that house is yours. note : boyfriend's house is not yours. and, i didn't like your attitude that day when you gave me that 'warning'. don't make it sounds as though i met your guy was for fuck or something. you jolly well know what i was there for. and he didn't 'report' to you, is none of my business? cause it's actually communication between you both? it's not i didn't tell him to think through things and sort it out with you. and since he treats you like this, don't you find something is amiss? both of you don't trust each other at all. this is from what i see. if there's trust, there's no need to 'report'. last time me and prince used to does that. but we don't do that anymore cause we know it ourselves what we're doing is right or wrong. we don't need frequent reminders to 'report' to each other. sometimes we hardly even have a call or message. cause both is busy with our stuffs. holding on is not a way to maintain a relationship, unless both parties really love each other deeply, not a one-sided matter. but are you both like this? do you both love each other deeply? how deeply is your deep? comments i made about you, most of them was negative because i saw my friend, from a cheerful person, became a person who's always unhappy and frowning. who would like to see their friend like that? and also cause of what you did to him last time. it's unfair and bias, i know. but this is life isn't it? show me you can make him a really happy person. then probably i can change my impression about this relationship of you both. i said all these doesn't mean i'm declaring war with you trying to tell you i don't want you as friend. but to let you know these are some of the problems i saw in you both. and it's not just one person's fault. so stop pushing blames to each other. you say he's in the wrong and he say you're in the wrong. so who's in the wrong? i don't like to see you both like this for both is my friend. think, we as outsiders will get sick and tired of seeing both black faces whenever you guys aren't happy. we would worry as well.. why make life so difficult for each other?

(:

awesome? (: hahas. it was comments from the video i posted on youtube for prince last year. if you're wondering which one is it... this is the link. (:

though me and prince is not zac and kate hanson. but i'm sure we're gonna be like them. (: happy ending. ^^ hahas.

alright, update soon bahhs. (:

byebye.

Quick

i gotta be quick cause i'm meeting micheal to pass him my lapyop. and i gotta make sure i really have enough battery to last until then. -.- lame lahh.

anyway today went to skate with steven and all. didn't really skate much cause of my wounds. still hurting. :( and the one on my palm is like, 'split' open and start bleeding again. -.- lame lahh! -.- and instead of training, we went to play dota. LOL.

and stuid joonjek took my drow ranger. idiot. -.- if not i would have own him flat flat. RAHH! ohh! talking about dota.. i forgot i'm suppose to help CY play dota against one fulleton. -.- well, wait till they contact me then. HAHA!

and, i need to shit. =/

byebye. update when my com is ready for use again. (: