Sometimes I feel, getting married can bring a couple closer together or it can break them apart. Because sometimes when I'm preparing all the weddings stuffs, doing all the researches and liaising with different people yet have to juggle my work at the same time, the stress level is something I've never experienced. Even though work has it's own level of stress but planning wedding, it's a totally different thing.
As I am aware of how important wedding is to me, well okay, it's important but not that important. To a lot of people, getting means having an official status as "wife". As important as people sees it, it's not the official status I want. I just want us to be happy. I've mentioned to Love before I don't mind us not getting married, staying together, being together and happily ever after. Haha. People must be thinking "stupid woman why want to do this to herself?" Well, because I can. Because to me, marriage doesn't mean happily ever after. Yes, it's once in a lifetime. But it doesn't guarantee happiness. I know what I want for us. I want us to be happy and us being together again is already a huge miracle which I'm happy about. I'm contented to be with the man whom I love with my life. And knowing that he loves me just as much is good enough. People may say I'm silly, I'm dumb and ridiculous. Well, this is my life, you can have your opinions and views but I don't care. Yes, I'm stubborn like this. And I like that I'm stubborn. Stubbornness has been a good and bad thing for me. But I still like me being stubborn. =p
So if I can choose, I would rather not get married, just be together happily and live our lives being silly and happy. Hahahaha. Or maybe just go to Barcelona and get married there, just the two of us. Lol. But I can't do so I have to deal with this. As much as I want to get things over and done with, it wouldn't be over until next year October. Well well well. I can do this!
Half way there already and I gotta admit that the initial stage really is a big headache cause too many options and choices and Love is so 'chin chai' until I'm so annoyed! But after I told him how I felt things got better. Hahahaha! Quite often I was so annoyed and pissed off that all I wanted to do was to call off the wedding. Cause to me, getting married and preparing for wedding makes us unhappy and that's not what I want! If getting married and preparing for wedding is the root of our unhappiness, I don't want it. That's why getting married is not exactly that important to me compared to other girls. Being together happily is what is more important to me. A piece of paper will not make me happy.
But well, I'm glad things got better after I told Love how I felt. Cause I think it's important that we both lay our cards on the table, being all honest and truthful in this relationship, that's what I want. And I know this man, will do all it takes to never lie to me. Because he loves me this much. To him, I'm that important that he can forgo his friends. Haha. Well, of course I don't need him to do that cause most of his friends are mine. We have too many common friends. Lol. 300+ friends in common since secondary school days, what else can I say/do right? Haha. We have too many things in common already..
Seemingly in this relationship, Love has been the giving in party while I'm the taking in party. I don't deny, because that's true. Love give in a lot to me because he don't want to argue with me. Well, not exactly argue, more like bicker. HAHA. But I also won't deny that I love to disturb him just to see his reactions. =P Like I will tell him once in a while that I will 離家出走 and go back to my place and he will be like ' Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo ' and I'll start laughing like some crazy woman. hahaha. Okay our own inside jokes. Hmm. Anyway he gives in to me most of the time and I know it's because he doesn't want me to be unhappy. He hates all kinds of arguments with me and he will try his best to stop all of them as soon as he can though sometimes he have his temper and would go mad too. But MOST of the time, he gives in.. But well, having said that, I do give in to him also okay.. just not MOST of the time. =P Because I love to be pampered by him and he pampers me too much. LOL.
Anyway, 9 more days to being a MRS. Am I nervous now, nope. Because I'll be on that day itself. LOL. I don't usually feel nervous until the very last minute. Horrible woman, I know. But my dearest fiance somewhat inculcated this habit to me, take my own sweet time. -.- HAHA okay, I should improve on that.
Now that almost everything is settled, I hope to have ample rest until next weekend. I don't want to look like some zombie in the morning when I go and meet my MUA at the Bridal Shop.
MRS LIM, kind of not used to it. Love tested it on me and I felt so alien to that. I guess it takes time. =) Love has started telling people that I'm his 太太 and having to hear him say that over the phone, it sounded quite weird. LOL.
