Batam with the skaters.
Bangkok with L, E and E's papa.
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| E's papa! |
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| L & myself. |
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| E! |
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| the 3 girls. |
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| half of my loots. or lesser. |
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| return flight on business class and there's in-flight meal. -.- |
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| leg room super big! :) |
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| fruit cup! |
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| met up with my primary school friend cause her birthday is coming! |
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| back to malaysia! |
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| look at how they look at each other, so melting! |
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| started this week with E's homemade tiramisu! |
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| met S to celebrate her birthday! |
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| change of my hairstyle. :) |
Just a while ago, i was saying that it's august already. and next week, it's gonna be september.
scary how time flies. and scary how we, changed with time.
in august, there are a few things..
- i went to batam with the skaters.
- i went to bangkok.
- i went back to hometown.
- a lot of people's birthday and one of them is my ex-boyfriend.
i used to look forward to waking up a brand new day. somehow now i dread everyday. they say it only happens to people who lost hope and i guess that's true.
august has thus far been so so. i've been thinking a lot.. but that's not anything new. i've always been thinking of the same old things.
random thoughts.. i thought of my ex-boyfriend as well. not a very good thing to do but somehow i miss the days with him. i don't mean i want to be with him again but just miss the days with him. days when he took my breath away, swept me off my feet and make me feel so loved and protected and i was the one and only in his eyes. days when we argue and quarrel so much because we care about each other so much and we never let a day pass without making up. days when we quarrel so hard yet we could end the day, making up with those passionate kisses. days when he was fighting for me, fighting to be with me, fighting to keep me. days when i really feel that someone really needed me in his life so badly and so real. those were the days.. reminisce. of course and surely, that's before he started cheating on me and lying to me and lost my trust. and i've long gotten over him. i just miss the times when i felt so real about relationship, about love.
definitely, we will never be able to love another person the way we loved our ex but that doesn't mean we love them lesser than our ex. and i don't see love the way i used to see too. things change, i changed too. people around me change too. i only hoped that with changes everywhere and anywhere, my relationship with the one i love stay. i've been trying hard but.. i feel like giving up already..
and i'm so tired..
so, so, so tired.
from all the thinking..
from all that has happened the past 6months.
feels like 2009. when i was all ready to release everything that i had and let go of what i've been holding on to. i need a really long, and good rest.
september, i'm not counting on you to be better for me. i just hope it will be better for the people around me.
goodbye.
until i'm ready, feeling better and maybe, happier.















