Depressed.

Baby @ 18 weeks!

11 November 2015

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Hey baby, you're growing so fast, well and healthy! You've been so active! And yes, you still hates it when Dr Phua checks on you! Hahaha! You kicked him when he was looking at you! Bad girl! You have to stay still and be a really good girl when you're going for your detailed scan alright! :) other than that you've been doing great! Making known to mummy about your movements and letting mummy know you're fine when I get worried not feeling your movements for almost a day.. And you! Have the same bad habit as daddy! So awake when it's midnight! You have to adjust your time so mummy can rest too okay! Don't be such a naughty baby! Hurhur! 

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25 November 2015

Now I know why mummies are depressed sometimes.

I may not be the slimmest before I'm a pregger and I may not have gained a lot of weight just yet. But my body is changing. I feel so heavy everywhere and it's depressing when you can't fit into your clothes, now even your bra and panty is too tight. The only thing that fits really nicely is wrap yourself with towel. -.- 

Love has been very sweet lately. Giving me the time and attention that I think every wife would love during pregnancy. 

You know, women being women, we tend to lose a lot of confidence especially when we're carrying such a big tummy and feeling so heavy, helpless and sometimes I find myself such a burden for people around me. It just don't make us feel good in a lot of ways. I feel ugly with the heaviness I'm feeling now. I never liked myself to be heavy. I've always thought that being heavy is ugly. Of course I meant in my opinion. Maybe because I'm a small sized person, being too big means I'm fat. Or maybe because Eric once made fun of me because I was fat at some point. Even though Love tried in many ways to reassure me that me being fat doesn't matter to him but it matters to me. Personally I think it's a very individual thing. Like a girl would prefer to make sure their brows are perfect than to have perfect lashes. I prefer to stay a small size person then. 

So, pregnany kind made me lose quite a fair bit of self confidence because I can't fit in my clothes. I don't understand why I can't fit in because in fact my weight didn't gain a lot. Mom told me because my joints are loosening and my bones are shifting so naturally I won't be able to fit into my clothes. Sigh. Don't get the logic. 

Of course there are people who tells me that I should just eat what I want and don't care about the weight. Honestly I didn't care about the weight and I just eat whenever I feel like. No specific control on diet except Love doesn't allow me to eat or drink stuffs that I cannot. Like sashimi, beer Etc. -.- other than that I eat almost everything. Haha. 

I'm back to my pre-pregnancy weight during my last check up on 11 Nov! That's a good news! I choose to believe I was the one who gained weight. Hahaha. Not baby. 

Love has been adjusting his sleeping hours to fit into mine cause my body is giving way as the tummy gets bigger. I dread waking up because my lower back hurts everytime I try to get up. The best position for me now is lying on the bed, not moving. Dr Phua wanted me to lie down more anyway due to the previous bleeding I encountered. 

29 November 2015

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Hey darling, we've done our detailed scan yesterday and you've done really great! Doctor said you're behaving well and have been very cooperative though you're very active! ^.^ 

We saw you kicking around, moving your hands, drinking water and sucking your thumb!! Saw your toes and fingers and your heart is beating strong! Doctor said you have long legs and arms which was what mummy wished for!! Heehee! Your nose bridge is still as obvious and all your joints are developed! We saw your little biseps too! Daddy said he might sign you up for MMA next time. Hahahaha! You like to play with your hands, putting them on your chin, posing for us to see and you keep kicking mummy nowadays! 

You've officially said hello to daddy with your karate kick yesterday too! Daddy finally felt your little hard kicks! Hurhur! Your movements are getting so so so frequent nowadays and you're behaving like daddy! Waking up in the night time and sleep during day time. -.- 

You're measuring about 15cm from head to butt and about 25cm adding your long legs. You're only slightly above average size which means you're really absorbing all the food and nutrients that mummy ate! Omg! 

It's good to see you growing well and being all so active. But please have some mercy on me at night okay? Let me have some good sleep! :) 

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We're glad that the detailed scan went well and baby is doing really great! 

I've been eating really well and still trying my best to get used to all the kicking that is getting harder as each day pass. 

So far Love has been doing great as a daddy to be. Never fail to always give in to me and always spending some tummy time with baby everyday. Baby respond well to him too! She moves whenever she hears his voice and sometimes she gets excited and start kicking me when I tell her we're going to meet daddy! She definitely knows how to please her daddy even before birth! Hahahaha! 

Next Gynae appointment will be on 09 Dec 2015 and we'll get to see more of her detailed scan photos! Can't wait to see them and keep a photo of them! Hehe! 

03 Dec 2015

Baby has been fine so not to worry. Love and I have been fine too also not to worry. Seems like Baby is making a routine in my belly now. She wakes up about an hour later after I wake up everyday and she wakes up after I eat everytime, without fail. Lol. 

It's no wonder she's gaining most of the weight! Mom is worried that she might be an overweight baby by EDD. :O was talking to mom and she asked if I'm going for natural or Caesarian. I'm going with natural and also considering not taking epidural. Love saw the video of how natural birth was like and he asked me to consider Caesarian. Hahaha. There's still some time though. I can think about it again but I'm quite firm with natural birth already. Those who know me knows that I'm not changing my mind after I made up my mind, unless I myself wants to. Stubborn I know. Too bad. 

Anyway, her waking up routine is at about 730am, 2:30-3pm, 8-9pm and about 2-3am. Usually I'll go to bed by 11pm nowadays and sometimes I still feel her movements at 2-3am just that I don't wake up. Lol. I talk to her a lot more nowadays. Hahahahaha. Imagine at night before I go to bed I would tel her "hey darling, it's mummy and baby bonding time! Time to sleep." Hahahaha. Or I'll tell her stuffs like "daddy is picking us up today!" Hehe. Most of the time she reacts to the word "daddy/papa" and would start kicking me. It's true when they said baby can hear you. They really do and they understand! Amazing right!? How would they know what we're talking about?! Hahaha. 

Whatever it is I just hope baby will be good and continue to grow up healthily. I'm kinda starting to worry for my belly size. I'm worrying it might get too big that I'm gonna have problem walking. =( I don't want to be bedridden. So please baby, just be a normal baby size okay? =( 

Her daily movements are my concern now. I need to feel her movements otherwise I'll start to worry. I know sometimes thinking too much is not good. But because I saw on a blog post of how a mother didn't notice/alert herself of the baby's movements, she lost her baby at 26weeks. Her baby didn't move for about 2-3 days and she thought it was normal cause sometimes baby's movements are so light that the placenta will absorb the impact. But when she thought something is amiss on the 3rd day, it was all too late. So her movements nowadays is crucial to me. I mean which mother wouldn't worry right? I'm only human and worrying about my baby is only natural. So Yeap, feeling her movements can be such a pain when she's moving so much and kicking so hard but at the same time it eases my mind knowing she's practicing her karate. Hahaha. 

Love and I have had so many conversations about this little lady. How protective he would be towards her and he address his worries to me as a father and how he would like to protect her. Sometimes I can't help but to laugh at his ideas because they're just overly protective ideas that's gonna make our girl go crazy when she grow older. Love has always been the more conservative one so to him he feels that his daughter should be well protected until she's 21. -.- of which I told him I'm not thinking like him. I want her to be independent as soon as she can think. It is important that woman nowadays is capable to protect herself not only physically but also financially. One day we are all going to be old and we will die. They can't depend on us forever. They need to learn to live without us. That's what my mom taught me, though I've yet to master that. Sounds harsh but this is life. I'm not the kind of girl who would live in fairy tales forever and day dream about everlasting. I'm rather realistic and practical when it comes to life. Lol. 

ZacKat Junior!

***drafted since 13August 2015***

13 August 2015

Yes. Zac and I will be having a baby. =)

And somehow I decided to start jotting down the pregnancy. 

We found out about the pregnancy on 11 August 2015. By then I was about 2-3 weeks, indicated by the test kit. 

I missed my menses which was scheduled and predicted to be on 06 August. Didn't think too much into it cause I messed up the dates and thought my menses was predicted to be on 08 Aug while I was in Hong Kong with the girlfriends. So when it was 10 Aug I thought I was just 2 days late and that's normal cause it happens sometimes. I am quite on the dot when it comes to menses but there are a few rare times when it came late like 2-3days (max) so I thought that was fine. 

Back in Singapore on 10 August and went to Joonjek's girlfriend's birthday chalet etc and everything was normal. Didn't felt uncomfortable except that I get tired easily. I have been feeling very bloated for quite a while and it is normal to me because I get bloatiness very easily. So again, I didn't think too much into anything! No morning sickness or any other symptoms yet except tiredness. Lol. 

When we went home that night, I told Love that my water retention seems to be getting worse (I get water retention easily). My rings are getting harder to remove and my feet looks bloated too. =( Love was telling me that I should do something to it (cause we both thought I was getting fat) and then it hit me suddenly that momsie told me before that pregnant lady will experience water retention. So I went to check my Pinkpad and realized my predicted menses date is earlier than I thought and I was more than just 2days late which is quite abnormal for myself. So the next day I went to buy 2 test kit, different ones and tried. First try in the morning, positive. But the second blue line was quite faint so I waited until noon again to try with a digital one. This time the word "Pregnant" showed up and a while after that it indicated 2-3. At that moment, it was a moment of confusion and.. Lost? So I messaged Love to inform him of the news and he kinda went gaga over it and told me that he wants to tell everyone about it. LOL. But I told him not to tell anyone first cause I would like to go to the Gynae to have check up first. He told chew anyway cause he was just beside him when I told him the news. So we kept this from almost everyone except chew and Kelly, who just got to know last night. 

We met chew and Kelly for dinner last night and I kinda felt bad and damn paiseh cause they seems to be so careful with me and very accommodating. I felt there's no such need cause I feel perfectly fine. I just hope they treat me normally. After dinner we went to watch movie and what was so unbearable the entire movie was the smell of McDonald. A group of people sitting behind us came in to the theater with McDonald and I couldn't figure what was that the whole time until I turned my head and saw them eating Mac!! But the whole time when I smell the McDonald I felt like vomiting. This is the first time I have such reaction and Love said that's because Baby doesn't like McDonald. LOL! I went online to do some reading and it mentioned that I would experience more stuffs when I hit 6 weeks onward. I hope I won't have morning sickness. =( 

What I think was worse is on the day we went for chalet and not knowing I'm pregnant, we got into an accident. Thankfully nobody is injured. Of course, we are hoping that the little one would be fine as we have yet to see my Gynae due to his packed schedule this week. We will be meeting the little one on Love's birthday. =) that's the earliest slot they have and Love wants me to arrange the earliest slot. So tadah! We will be going on Monday afternoon. =)  

15-16 August 2015

Love has been extra caring and loving ever since we found out about the pregnancy. Worry that I don't have enough food and always making sure I eat what I want to. And not to mention he has been fetching me from work since the day I told him about the news. Haha. Love said he wants to take photo of my tummy every month to see his baby's growth. -.- I told him there's not gonna be much movements until about 4months. Everyday he will be so careful with me now. No bending, no squatting, no carrying of heavy stuffs. I'm just like a royal highness suddenly. LOL. Well, privilege of preggy. And xiaobai is definite not allowed to jump on me anymore. Hahaha. Love keeps telling xiaobai "mummy got baby cannot jump ok!" Hahaha. He would also sillily talk to my tummy and say things like "hello baby Zac, how are you? You will see papa soon ok?" Lol. 

So far through the pregnancy I've been feeling fine, glad that I've not had morning sickness. Praying I won't encounter any of them either. I get tired and hungry very easily. Gets tired about every 4-5hrs. And gets hungry about every 2-3hrs. Fml. Told Love that this baby is out to make me fat. I also drink a lot more water and I pee a lot. -.- not sure if that's a good or bad news when I get water retention so easily. -.-

17 August 2015

Love made me angry this morning. He went to play poker with Eddy they all and told me he'll be done by 2am. He ended up being home at 4+am! How frustrating when we are visiting the Gynae today and I've emphasized to him on how packed my gynae's schedules are and that we cannot be late! We waited one week for this check up. -.- he came home at 4+ and ended up sleeping at 9am. Why I don't want him to be out late because I know he knows no limit and will not stop. Worse thing is people around him doesn't stop him either. Okay, for this instance I can't blame anyone because no one knows about the baby yet. Though chew knows but I know he can't do anything now too. 

It is very frustrating why should I be the one to deal with all the shit whereas he gets to go out until late, enjoying himself. It pisses me off. Making me not want any kids because I want my freedom too. -.- selfish thought it may be but who isn't selfish? People who think that married woman must give birth are also selfish. Why MUST they give birth?! Honestly speaking no woman is obligated to give birth okay! So when you set this kind of demand on others you better ask yourself what can you sacrifice or provide?! There's a price to pay for everything you want. You want a kid, use your time and freedom to pay for it. -.- 

Baby @ approximately 6 weeks. You can't even see anything yet!

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Hi baby, we went for the first visit with Dr Phua today and we saw the tiny you on the screen. 

Pardon mummy for having some kind of selfish thoughts because mummy felt that daddy is not ready to sacrifice and your arrival now is not the right time. As much as I anticipate and welcome your arrival, I don't want the consequences to be mummy and daddy to be quarreling over you and your responsibilities etc etc. Because knowing your daddy, he's not ready to commit to a baby and same time, knowing myself, I would not be able to tolerate your daddy being the way he is now.. There are a lot to consider now knowing your existence. Things could be a lot more easier and simpler without you. Of course I hope daddy can learn to be more mature and sensible and not always in his own world anymore. After all, Daddy wants to keep you and honestly, mummy doesn't want to lose a baby.

We will see how things goes. 

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My dad passed away on the same day we went for Gynae check up. We were at the hospital with him after the check up. He looked normal and is able to talk to us. We went downstairs for a break and came back up at about 5ish he was still looking fine. He could still request to sit on the chair and managed to do that. He even asked for papaya to eat. He looked perfectly fine. We bid him goodbye cause we were going for dinner and he could still wave us goodbye. Telling us to go ahead. We left the hospital, sent my sister and cousin back home and then went for our dinner appointment. Just as we step into the restaurant, my mom called and I knew something is not right. She told me that my dad has stopped breathing. We rushed back to the hospital only to see him lying there, motionless. He wasn't the same as before we left the hospital. It was too sudden. It all happened too fast that I can't seems to react properly. I don't seems to have time to react to what just happened. 

Then the whole week was about the wake, funeral and settling dad down at his new place. 

31st August 205

Baby @ 7 weeks 4days. We can see a little of it! =)

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Hi baby, we heard your heartbeat today. =) and that's probably the only thing that mummy worry the most by far. The next thing I'm worry about will be down syndromes and hepatitis B issues. I hope when we do Oscar test everything will turn out well. 

You've been a good baby, not giving mummy much problems except always feeling hungry and tired at very wrong timings. Oh, and causing mummy's back to ache and sore really badly. Haha. Now, continue to grow well, grow healthy and be good okay.. =) 

Daddy has been a good boy lately too. Applying pain relief gel for mummy every night and bringing me to eat whenever I'm hungry. Except that he always laze in bed as he sleep late. I hope your arrival will turn his body clock so drastically that it will go back to normal. I hope your existence will change his life, of course for the better. And somehow I hope you're here to torture him too. Hahaha. Grandma ever told me that if the parent is very horrible, the baby will be more horrible for the parent to deal with. A taste of its own medicine. I hope you're daddy's medicine in this sense. Heh. 

//

01 Sep 2015

Unknowingly, dad has passed on for 2 weeks. How time flies.. Sigh.. Sometimes I wonder why is time passing so fast.. =\ I don't seems to have enough time everyday. 

I wish time could turn back at times. 

Oh my dear baby, you're making my eyes close at this time.. 10pm..

03 Sep 2015

Omg baby, I'm sorry for sleeping late last night. It's only 11:40am and you're making mummy's eyes so sleepy. I could barely open my eyes. =( no no.. T.T

Baby you're 8 weeks old today. >.< Please continue to be a good baby.. =)

19 Sep 2015

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Hi baby, what is happening to you inside of me? Mummy noticed spotting today and told grandma and daddy about it. Grandma said you're 10weeks 2days old you should be fine. But she asked me to speak to you and ask you to be a good baby. Because you're scaring mummy! Is it because mummy was feeling so angry just the day before? I'm sorry. Because mummy hates it when people try to take control of my life events. Mummy hates it when people try to overwrite my plans. Sorry if my emotion is the cause for you feeling upset. Mummy needs to be away from anyone who have potential to nag at mummy or try to control how mummy should live life. Bear with it for a while more, all these unstable emotion will end soon. 

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23 Sep 2015

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Hi baby, we saw you again today! You've grown so much compared to the last visit! Your heartbeat is so loud and fast and daddy is so amazed by that! We were both worried about you because of the spotting that lasted quite a few days. But Dr Phua said you're doing fine. :D and he said you're in siting position today. Daddy said you looked so chill sitting there. 😂 you're now 4.32cm measuring from your head to your butt. So so tiny, so so fragile. Please grow up well and strong. Daddy and mummy will see you very soon. Like daddy said, he can't take care of you now because you're inside my womb so he have to take care of mummy now. Haha. 托你的福！And oh! Dr Phua said mummy lost weight since the last visit! How can that be?! Mummy have been eating! >.<

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02 October 2015

Baby ZK is now 3 months 2 days old. Love announced to his family about the pregnancy during our food tasting with the restaurant that day. 

The reason why I didn't want Love's family to know is because I do not want them to tell the whole world about it. Knowing them, especially his mom, she would do that and I'm totally not comfortable to let so many people know. And all the more I don't want them to know after knowing Love's ah ma wants me to address her as lao ma(the way my kids should call her) during our tea serving ceremony which I'm totally against doing. 

I'm not the kind who would do things to please people for the sake of pleasing people. It's illogical and ridiculous to me because by doing that it's as good as telling me straight to my face that once I'm married into this family, my position is degraded to be the same as my child. Siao meh? They think I yearn for this status so badly that I would do this to myself? Nope. I don't really care about status actually. So no, don't force me. I can do all kinds of crazy things if people force me to do things I don't want to do. Wedding day has no exception. Not for anyone. You may call me stubborn but I like my stubbornness. Because this is the only way I can protect myself from anyone out of my comfort zone. Meh. 

05 Oct 2015

Baby @ 12 weeks 3 days.

Love and I went for check up at Thomson Medical last Saturday. Haha. We went there for Oscar Test (a test for down syndromes). The test involved doing an ultrasound for the baby and required my blood for testing too. 

Not so much of a problem when it comes to ultrasound except that the first scan baby was sleeping/taking a nap and doctor needs baby to be awake and shift to the position she needs. >.< so she asked us to go for a walk and wake the baby up. Love and I went to grab something light to eat and we kept talking to the tummy and asking the baby to wake up. Hahahaha! So after about 30mins, doctor called us in for a second scan. This time the baby is awake! Hahaha! It's so amazing because we saw so many movements from the baby! It's only about 6cm and the baby is so active! Heard the heartbeat and this is our main concern from the start. Second concern is the down syndromes. But we had a good news from the doctor that day that baby has very obvious nasal bone which is a very good news for down syndrome test because it's an indication that baby is all good! =)=)=)

We saw the baby drinking water, moving the mouth, doing stretching, turning around, lying on the side, crossing the legs and moving nonstop! Love was so so so amazed when he watch the screen. Hurhur. However, we didn't managed to see the baby's gender. Hahaha! Love's is pretty anxious about this because he said he would prefer a boy as he would really be stressed if the baby is a girl. He stressed because he would be so protective towards the baby girl. Hahaha. If it's a boy he wouldn't need to worry so much. Doctor said we would probably be able to tell the gender at about 16weeks -20weeks. And Love kept asking me to ask baby to open the legs in fear it's gonna be a girl. LOL!

I guess this baby is starting to change our life. The concern is all about the baby now. In my mom's case it's more about me because I'm losing weight from this pregnancy. Apparently mom said baby absorbed all the food I ate and is growing well. That's why I'm not absorbing any nutrients and is losing weight. So she's asking me to eat this and that now. But because I'm pregnant there's a lot of things I can't eat. :( 

Oscar test result will be out in about a week's time. Our check up with Dr Phua is next Wednesday so the result should be out by then. Crossing all my fingers and toes that baby will be all good! >.< 

And then, second part of the test requires my blood. This is the part I really hate and dread the most! Worse thing is Love can't go in to the room with me! :( so I ended up going alone and I screamed when the needle poke me. Tears almost fly out literally. Came out of the room and Love asked if I screamed. I said yeah and he said it was so loud that everyone outside was looking into the room. Okay that's embarrassing. =| Dr Phua said he will be drawing another tube of my blood for another test next week. Omg..... I hate blood test. Really hates it. =( I know. Baby is worth it blah blah blah. BUT IT STILL HURTS AND I'M STILL SCARED! 

07 October 2015

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Hey baby, Dr Phua's clinic called this morning. It's regarding the Oscar test we went for on last Saturday. We were scheduled to visit Dr Phua next Wednesday but Dr Phua say he do not wish to wait until next week so mummy is scheduled to see him tomorrow morning last min. Informed daddy about this and he's been so worried the whole time. He requested for time off tomorrow morning so that he can see you too. What's happening to you? Are you okay? Mummy is trying hard not to think about what might happen. Please just be fine okay? Daddy and mummy is waiting for your arrival. =)

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08 October 2015

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Hey baby, bad news from Dr Phua today. Oscar test result is 1:137 which makes you a high risk in getting down syndrome. We don't know what's the cause for this result. Maybe because mummy's body is weak in nature or maybe there's some other causes. Dr Phua suggested to go for NIPT or amniocentesis test. Daddy and I forgo amniocentesis because Dr Phua said there might be a chance for miscarriage and daddy doesn't want to put mummy through the pain. So we went for NIPT test which can give us a 99.9% of accuracy if you will be having any kind of down syndromes. Both daddy and mummy were kinda lost for words when Dr Phua announced the result to us. Somehow I could sense that daddy is puzzled and upset because all along he thought women at mummy's age would not fall into high risk. As upset as I can get, I know I have to be strong for you and daddy. Daddy is not a mentally strong guy so I can't show my upset side. So please baby, be safe, be strong and be well. If anything happens to you now, I believe both daddy and mummy won't be able to cope emotionally. =(

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09 October 2015

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Hey baby, you see how dear you are to daddy now? He already love you before he even meet you. =) yesterday was quite a tough day for both of us. Mummy was feeling all exhausted from the excessive extract of blood for further tests and because it hurts so badly mummy somehow teared a little. ='( mummy is afraid all kinds of injections to be very honest. Within a week about 4 large tubes and 1 small tube of blood is drawn for test. I've never experienced this before. =( so yeah, after the blood test mummy and daddy went home to rest. Few moments of blackouts here and there at home but luckily I'm at home. Daddy was with me all the while. Thankful for his officer who allow him to take off to accompany mummy. :) 

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12 October 2015

The past two days haven't been good. It was supposed to be good because we had our 過大禮 on Saturday. But instead, it didn't turn out well. Love told me in the morning that his parents will not be coming over. Only his brother will be and he said in his message that "legend said Zhang Bei cannot guo da Li" so I told mom what he said. Mom flared up and when they reach she told them that she will not be returning anything and asked them to leave. For this instance I don't agree with mom with the way she reacted because whatever it is things can be talked out nicely, there's no need to make it look so bad. There's no point cause it's supposed to be a happy occasion. And next thing is zac's grandma requested me to address her as 老嬤 during tea serving ceremony which mom strongly disagreed cause she felt that it's a form of degrading my position in his family and that his grandma is out to bully me even before customary. To be very honest I felt it's illogical to me and that's the reason why I disagree. I mean obviously I don't think so much into it like my mom. I'm just not comfortable because the tradition is to follow what your husband calls. I've asked so many people and all told me to follow my husband. 

In the end zac's parents decided not to ask his grandma over for tea ceremony since this is causing so many problems. So we will only be serving tea to his parents only. I know when his dad said that he's not very happy about it and I know he gave in by agreeing to what mom said. 

Zac's parents came over in the end cause mom was behaving like some crazy woman who doesn't talk reasonably. It upset both Zac and I a lot actually. Now Zac doesn't know how to face her and is refusing to come over to my place already. I tried to talk to mom but she just don't seems to be able to accept and listen to people. Sigh. 

//

23 October 2015

Baby @ 15 weeks. =) 

Finally, all the pain and agony is over. I don't have to deal with the "Lao ma" shit anymore. Anyway I've made up my mind about Love's ridiculously unreasonable  ah ma. 

To be very honest, a respectable person will always get their respect from everyone around them, in or out of their house. Look at my Popo, people in my village respect her naturally. Unlike Love's ah ma, getting respect only in the house just because she's "ah ma". Sorry to say, she's don't even have half of my Popo's vibe to be respected for. 😒 don't throw your weight at me because I don't freaking buy it. 

During the dinner she kept giving us that black face is enough. From now on I'm not gonna deal with her. Just get out of my life already. I don't normally say I don't like someone. But I don't like her and her attitude towards people. She have her rules, I have mine too. And her kind of rules will never be brought to my own family in the future. Never. 

Talking about her really can piss me off. Never mind about her. 

On a happier note, NIPT test result is out and baby is all fine, normal and healthy! And that's the best news for us during last week's roller coaster ride. ^.^ and next best news was uncle was approved to come over just two days before the dinner and I'm so happy!!! ^.^ threw away all unhappiness! And Love finally came over to my place and now he and mom are fine now. Mom gave him a hug when she saw him. :) 

Anyway, we went to see Dr Phua on Wednesday cause I was bleeding on Tuesday. I guess the whole wedding planning/saga plus not enough rest on wedding day has taken its toll on me. Dr Phua checked the baby, baby is fine and moving a lot. That's a very good news. :) it's so worrying but Dr Phua said my low placenta caused the bleeding and asked me not to move so much, no exercise, no running, no jumping and no walking too much. =\ oh and baby is a girl. She's so gonna be daddy's girl next time. Love is already telling that we have to treat her like a princess but teach her to be a queen. 😂 told Love he's spoiling her before she's even born and he told me "I'm supposed to spoil her, you're supposed to fix her" Hahahaha. 

Somehow I'm so glad for her existence. Because of her, Love and I are able to smile and laugh during such tough times. If not for her I think it's hard to get pass those difficult times. So please grow well my little Kat. :) 

I told Love that just the day before Dr Phua announced the gender of the baby, I dreamt of a baby girl with very big eyes and the hair is tied like a coconut tree. Very pretty and I've not seen her before. I shall take it as a sign that tells me the baby is a girl. Hahaha. I hope baby will grow up like the little girl in my dream. So pretty and adorable!

We are so looking forward to her arrival now. =)
//

30 October 2015

I love the way Love kiss my tummy and spend some time having silly talks with my tummy as well. Heh. Silly acts but it shows how much he loves her already. Somehow I can imagine how much Love is gonna spoil this daddy's girl already. Well of course I hope he would know his limits. Otherwise this girl is gonna grow up with unbearable 公主病 which I really don't want! Maybe because I grew up in a family where my mom placed a lot of expectations on me and also being the strictest with me. I wasn't given any rooms to be pampered and spoilt because mom constantly reminds me of the responsibilities I have for this family. My biological dad pamper and spoilt me in a way that no one would. Looking back I realized it's not a good thing for me. Because if I had grown up with him, I would be a rather useless princessy girl who only want things her way. And if I'm not given what I asked for, I would tear down the whole house kind of attitude. My dad was the youngest child of my grandma and my grandma dotes on him the most. So naturally when I was born my dad's child, she dotes on me the way she dotes on him. Yeap, I was actually born a spoilt brat until my mom took over my custody and raise me up in a way I couldn't understand when I was young but now I do. Having seen the different Singaporean girls growing up with different family backgrounds/upbringing, I doubt I would let my girl grow up being a spoilt princess. I want her to be independent and strong. Hahaha it may be hard to tell now but we will see how to deal with this daddy's girl. Of course, deal with the daddy too. Heh.

04 November 2015

You're 17 weeks today!

//
Hey Baby! You're growing really fast! Look how time flies! You're 17 weeks now! ^.^ You're really not showing mercy on the baby bump anymore! =( Grandma said you've been waiting for this for too long already that's why you're showing yourself so quickly now. hurhur! Continue to grow well my little darling! =) Daddy and I can't wait to see you next Wednesday!
//

Things have been pretty much on track, leaving all those 不管重要的人 aside. Somehow in a way or another I've decided to eliminate those people who's gonna make my life difficult or unhappy for me regardless who they are. Like my FIL said, "we all live for ourselves." I will never forget this sentence. So yes, not gonna deal with shitty people in my life and make things so tough for myself anymore. Had enough of all the craps that was given to me. Enough is enough, when I start to don't give a shit, I don't give a single shit. Piss me off and you deal with how I'm gonna deal with you. Bloody morons. -.-

Anyway, on the side note, today is a good day!

Because it's flat selection day! ^.^

We managed to choose the unit we want! So so so so happy! That also means we need to work hard for this house now! With the baby coming our way soon as well, more money is needed! Although Love is making some good money but I always believe money don't come that easily. We have to work for it. And, too much money is never a problem, no money is a problem, especially in Singapore when money is so hard to earn. For the baby, for the house and for a better future, time to work harder! Jiayou jiayou! =)

So glad to know that we have neighbours already. Dennis and Jaslyn is just a 5mins walking distance away from us and I'm so happy that they're near us. Cause Jas has always been one of the few girls whom I'm close to. Further more Caijun is gonna be nearby too. Happen to also know that some of my secondary school friends are just a few streets away from us and that makes me feel like our choice is a good choice! TEEHEE. What can be better than having to be close with people whom you're familiar with? Tsk! Super glad for this!

Next up, need to settle baby's insurance soon too! Going to 18 weeks and we're looking at options! 20 weeks test will be done soon, hopefully everything will go well! =D 

Different Perspectives

乐嘉老师都被骂哭了，这个女人震惊13亿人！
Posted by 娱乐城 on Thursday, June 11, 2015

 I watched this video and had quite a big realization about myself.

Sometimes I guess in life, your perspective of life changes as you age.

What you deemed as important last time will no longer be that important anymore.
Sometimes I wonder what causes the changes..

Time, maybe?
Situations, maybe?

Lately there are too many things that happened and made me change quite a lot.

Marriage, family, friends..

Marriage made me realised how much I love my life being just in relationship and not having a status that makes me feel so 'heavy'.

Family made me realized how much my mom had pamper me in the past.

Friends made me realized no matter how nice you are to them, they can turn their back on you and made you feel so worthless.

I love being in relationship. Maybe because I love to take care of someone to a certain extend. I love to share my life with a special someone.

Actually to be honest, one can do the same without being in a relationship.

I don't deny I can do without a partner too. But who would deny the fact that human being human, we don't like to feel lonely.

七个对不起，让你懂得什么是爱。

男孩和女孩从小就认识，男孩经常约女孩一起去村外的池塘边捉小虾，每次男孩总是满载而归，女孩却是两手空空，女孩总是失落的含着眼泪，独自一个人回到家，然后闷闷不乐。晚饭前，男孩敲响女孩家的门，女孩一见是男孩，扭头就走，男孩追上前，对女孩说：“对不起，我把你的虾都捉走了，给，我把它们养在小鱼缸里，送给你。”女孩眉头一放，慧心的笑了，就这样反复着他们纯纯的童年，转眼，他们各自成长着。

——纯纯的“对不起” 。


男孩总是喜欢戏弄女孩，经常会把女孩逗到哭，然后又去哄女孩到她笑为止，直到长大后，也是如此。
男孩经常偷偷的把女孩的自行车轮胎的气放到没有，然后躲在远处，看女孩着急的走投无路，等着女孩拨通他的手机，然后破口大骂他的小贼行为。可男孩，依旧那么喜欢这样的女孩。他窃窃的从远处走来，灰溜溜的为女孩推着那辆没了气的自行车，任由女孩在一旁发牢骚，男孩却暗自窃喜，然后委屈的对女孩说：“对不起，我知道错了。”随即，女孩便会柔弱下来，告诉男孩下次不允许那样，男孩点头，于是，那时的他们每天都充满着笑容。

—— “对不起”的快乐 。



大学毕业后，男孩和女孩各自有了工作，男孩的工作总是很忙，有时一个月都休息不到一次，而女孩总是抱怨男孩冷落了她，终于，他们有了第一次的吵架。女孩委屈的哭起来，可男孩却很理直气壮的告诉女孩：“这是为了我的工作。”这场冷战持续了很久。终于，女孩还是忍不住，主动和男孩和好了。后来很多次男孩和女孩都因为这样的小事而吵得不可开交，可每次，都是女孩先妥协。
那年，女孩生日，男孩答应女孩要给他过一个浪漫的生日，女孩欣喜不已，她在家精心打扮，等着男孩回来陪她渡过这个美妙的生日，这一等就是凌晨，女孩在睡梦中醒来，脸上挂着泪痕，男孩见到女孩，心疼的为女孩擦去脸庞的泪痕：“对不起，嫁给我好吗？”于是男孩拿出一枚戒指。

—— “对不起”也是一种承诺。



婚后，男孩的事业大有成就，经常有许多应酬，而女孩已经成为一个专职太太了，每天在家为男孩准备热菜热饭，把家里收拾的干干净净，她经常会去菜场买回一些小河虾放在鱼缸里养着，男孩总问他为什么，女孩却总是慧心的一笑。
慢慢的，男孩每次回家，身上总是充满了不同的香水味道，而每次没等女孩问，男孩总是忙着解释说应酬太多。女孩黯然，那时起，女孩不太爱说话了，也不像以前那么开朗了，她总是喜欢成天的呆在家里，抱着枕头看韩剧，然后随着剧情哭泣，夜深时，就会疯狂的大哭。以后的日子里，男孩回来时，身上的香水味只有一种味道了，女孩从来不问，可是男孩依旧说：“对不起，今天又去应酬了。”

—— “对不起”，谎言的开始。


渐渐的，男孩开始不回家，或总是在外出差，男孩的事业越来越好，身边都是奉承的人，他每天都在别人的恭维下自豪的笑着，而女孩，几乎不出门了，她总会去超市买上很多方便面，和一些必要的日用品，然后把自己关在家里，这一呆就是很久。从前，女孩会经常和男孩一起聊聊天，而现在，她孤身一人，身边没有一个可以说话的人，每次打电话问男孩什么时候回家，男孩总是仓促的回答到：“对不起，我太忙了。”女孩，失落的扣上电话，那以后她再也没有问男孩什么时候会回家。

—— “对不起”，只是个敷衍的方式。



女孩学着电视上的样子，开始打扮自己，她觉得男孩不回家，也许是看腻了她，她决定不再颓废，自己的幸福应该靠自己争取，而不是无谓的后退。
那天，女孩心血来潮，按照地址去了男孩工作的地方，那是女孩第一次去，也是唯一的一次。女孩涩涩的按下电梯，来到这个男孩经常说忙的地方，她细细的观察这个公司的每个角落，这里的一切，她都觉得很好看。终于，绕过长长的办公走廊，她来到男孩的办公室，轻轻的推开门……女孩愣住了，眼前看到的不是自己的丈夫，也不是那个经常弄坏她自行车的那个贼小子，更不是那个把虾放在小鱼缸里的男孩，而是一个正在和别的女人做爱的男人。那个女人坐在桌子上，******的发出微弱的呻吟声，那个男人，仿佛山林里饿极了的野兽……
许久，男孩才发现了女孩，男孩惊慌失措，忙把衣裤捡起来穿好。可女孩，转身离开了。男孩飞奔出去，追着女孩，那晚，大雨袭击了整个城市。女孩不顾男孩的叫喊，径直往前跑，往回家的方向跑，男孩在女孩后面大喊：“对不起，我还是爱你的，对不起，我真的只爱你。”可女孩，始终没有听见。

—— 这样的“对不起”太伤人。


男孩一直都没有找到女孩，女孩失踪很久了。男孩的世界已经一片黑暗，无心工作，无心花天酒地，他想不到女孩可以去哪里，因为女孩没有朋友，她唯一的朋友就是男孩，男孩终日守着电话机，手机24小时不关机，怕错过了女孩的电话。这一等就是半年多。
快递为男孩送来一个盒子。
男孩打开一看，里面是许多河虾的标本，有的在树叶边休息，有的在水草里躲着，各式各样的河虾标本，旁边放着一封信。

“ 我始终没有勇气再见到你，可能是我太懦弱，也或许是我根本不想见到你，我想这些『警告：注意文明用语！』应该过的没什么两样吧，我很好，我学会了离开你怎么让自己存活，我懂得了怎样赚钱养活自己，而不用每天等着你回家，为你烧一桌热腾腾的饭菜，直到凉了也不见你的人，我的手机已经不用了，因为我已经不会再为你24小时的不关机，让自己饱受辐射的折磨。我懂得怎样去爱惜自己，珍惜自己的本来应该美好的生活。我想，我是可以忘记怎么去爱你的，因为你把我的爱弄得遍地麟伤。
离婚协议书，就压在鱼缸的底下，你签完字，按照地址给我寄过来就行了。
对不起，我想我是真的累了。”

男孩按照地址找去，他满心希望能够见到女孩，然后让女孩原谅，并且告诉女孩自己不能没有她，可是打开门的却是女孩的父亲，而女孩就站在她父亲的身后——是女孩的遗像。
女孩的父亲告诉男孩，女孩在写完这封信后，跳楼自杀了，血肉一片模糊。

—— 原来“对不起”也可以是种结束。

那一年，男孩疯了。

每个人在自己的生命里头，一定会遇到一个自己真正该珍惜的人。请你好好的珍惜那一个人，不是每一句的对不起，都可以换来每一句的没关系……千万不要辜负了自己心爱的人，那对谁，都不好……把这个故事传下去，让你的朋友们知道，不要随意地说出对不起......



看了有什麽感觸嗎?
心疼?
傷心?

Of What Used To Be..

I used to be very happy that you would make an effort to spend your weekends with me, going to places that I want to go. 

I used to be very happy that you would plan a date for us.

I used to be very happy that you make it a point to visit me at my place, even if it were to be only 5 minutes. 

I used to be very happy that you would try means and ways just to make me happy.

I used to be very happy that you would confide in me. 

I used to be very happy that you would make time to have lunch with me off your busy work schedule.

I used to be very happy that you would ask me how was my day.

I used to be very happy that you greet me good morning, via a simple text. 

I used to be very happy that you would go all the way to my place just to send me to work in the morning.

I used to be very happy that you didn't mind waiting for 4hrs under my block just so you could go out with me.

I used to be very happy that you would end work earlier just to have dinner with me and spend the rest of the night with me doing nothing at home.

I used to be very happy that you would hug me each time you send me home.

I used to be very happy that you would listen to my feelings.

I used to be very happy that you care a lot more than I do.

I used to be very happy that you value the time spent with me.

I used to be very happy that you would hold my hand everywhere we go. 

I used to be very happy that you would be protective towards me.

I used to be very happy that you would always spare a thought for how I feel.

I used to be very happy that you would want me to rely on you.

I used to be very happy that you make me feel that I mattered a lot to you. 

I used to be very happy that you make me feel like I was the center of your world. 

I used to be very happy that you view this reunion of us as a significant part of your life. 

I used to be very happy that you would always go that extra miles for me. 

I used to be very happy that you never let any issues between us pass the night without talking it out.

I used to be very happy that you make sure that I smile to sleep.

They were the reasons I started believing in you, believing in this relationship. They were the reasons why we're we today. They were the reasons why there's us today. 

But what happened?.. 

Devastated I may be but I'm greatly disappointed. 

You promised to give me happiness, promised never to fail me again. 

But yet this is what you're giving me. 

Do you remember the days when you would bring me to pet farm to spend the whole afternoon looking at animals? Do you remember the days when you would drop by my place, talk to me for 5 minutes and left? Do you remember the days when you would meet me for lunch just because you're nearby my office? Do you remember the days when we would go out with friends for some drinks? Do you remember the days we would just stay home and talk about no tomorrow? 

All I wanted was us to be happy.We were, we really were. 

But why the change? Why the change along with our marital status? 

We were doing fine.. Why make such changes to us? 

If I had known what marriage would have done to us, I wouldn't choose to get married. 

If I had known that you're not ready to commit to a marriage, a family and as a husband, I wouldn't choose to get married. 

I shouldn't have try so hard to give you assurance by marrying you. 

I love you. Yes I do, through poverty or wealth. I love you.

But don't take my love for granted, don't take my presence for granted. 

I would sacrifice my life for anything or anyone I love. But don't make me feel like you're taking me for granted. 

Just don't. 

Don't make me give up on you. 

Life of Miss Law to Mrs Lim.

A drastic change I would say. It caused a lot of unhappiness and frustrations. 

And I hate changes. I always do. I never ever like any kind of changes. 

Almost every girl wish that even though marital status change, things would remain. But the hard truth is it will never be. 

Being Miss Law, I don't need to bother or care about anything else except for myself and my family. 

Boyfriend is not a priority as compared to my family. I mean, not top of my list. 

Being Mrs Lim, I need to prioritize my husband and everything I do, I have to think for my husband. 

Being Miss Law, my life was happier because I care lesser. Because my commitment and responsibilities level are not high. I'm responsible for myself. 

Being Mrs Lim, my husband's well-being became my responsibilities. My life is unhappy because I have to teach my husband how to commit to a marriage, not a boy/girl relationship. I became a 'mother' of my husband suddenly. I hate having to nag at people because I hate to be nagged at. 

My list could go on and on. 

No doubt, life of being someone's wife, I'm not that happy. 

Not happy in the sense that it seems that the responsibilities for this marriage is being thrown to me like as if it's mother nature thing. Not happy that I have to deal with all the pressures coming to me due to my husband's doings and behaviours. Honestly, as much as I wish not to be nagged/questioned at for his behaviours etc, it is just inevitable. Feedback and comments just keep coming to me. I believe this is a family's culture. My family don't have such practice. 

Today is 21st century, we no longer live in the olden days when women had to listen to men, do what the men told them to do. This generation, BOTH parties are responsible for a marriage. BOTH parties are responsible for upholding the marriage. BOTH parties have to work TOGETHER for the marriage.BOTH parties are responsible for their own house etc etc. It is not just the WIFE's responsibility. 

Honestly speaking, when a guy decide to propose and be married, he's old enough to think and do things with a level headed mind. 

He should know what's right or wrong.

He should know what he should do.

He should know what is called prioritizing. 

How many man in this world actually thinks that getting a wife is for them to take care of everything single things in his life, big or small, important or not? Regret to inform, this service is only available at maid agencies. 

Yes I know, a lot of other men don't treat their wife like that, a lot of other men are much more considerate compared to the others. But for those who thinks otherwise, WHAT WORLD ARE YOU LIVING IN? It's as good as telling me you thought your mother gave birth to you by shitting you out. HELLO?????

A man who is not ready to commit to a family should not get married. 

A man who only care about himself should not get married.

A man who only wants to enjoy himself should not get married. 

A man who doesn't know how to prioritize his life should not get married. 

Personally I don't believe in marriage. Just because we got married doesn't guarantee we will be happy. I believe I've always emphasized this to anyone. Yes, anyone. Don't be so silly to think that getting married means happily ever after. It may and may not be. 

Why is it that people get married? To put it bluntly, to make it legal to have sex. But does it matters nowadays? People look at you and they think 'confirm not virgin' (of my age I mean) whether you are or not. Okay, let's not talk about my age, some people of younger age than I am. So, what's the difference between married and in a relationship? 

I'm frustrated, very frustrated. Frustrated about the whole marriage, frustrated about the wedding. Most frustrated about the changes marriage had done to my life!! 

When is this frustration going to leave? 

Because I'm really going crazy and I have no idea what I'm going to do next. 

Irony.

To the person who said no man would want a girl like me. 

I'm sorry to disappoint you. Lol. 

Baby Plans.

Now that ROM is over. People are asking us when are we gonna have Monster Z. LOL. 

Not so soon I believe. We still have our Photoshoot next year April followed by our customary in October. I suppose baby plan will be after customary. So now, let me have a small break because one xiaobai is headache enough!  

But I can't deny how much she made us love her. :')

Watching xiaobai growing up slowly everyday and learning things everyday.. It's very amazing and we love to watch her. Everyday we bring her down for a walk and she definitely loves it. Seeing her so happy it makes us happy too. ^.^

 

Ever since she came, the house is noisier but happier. A lot more laughter and everyday everyone will look for her. She somehow became everyone's priority. It's like she's a baby and needed our attention so everyone will give her the attention she wants. Funny it may be but yes it happened.

 

She's not some expensive dogs but August found her at the woods. Vet said she's a Mongrel but she doesn't even look like one. We all thought she's a Labrador mix. Whatever it is, it doesn't really matter to us. We saved her and we feels that she's perfect the way she is. I just hope she's gonna grow up well because somehow I feel her eyesight has some problems. Not sure if it's because she's young or it's natural.

 

Okay, back to my topic. Can't stop talking about her once I start. Hahahaha.

Baby plans.. probably 2016. =)

MARRIED!

"I Law Chee Sim, take you Lim Zhanyu to be my husband, my partner in life and my one true love. I will cherish our union and love you more each day than I did the day before. I will trust you and respect you, laugh with you and cry with you, loving you faithfully through good times and bad, regardless of the obstacles we may face together. I hope you know that right from the start it has been you, it is you and it will always be you. Today I give you my hand, my heart, and my love, from this day forward for as long as we both shall live." - my wedding vow for Love.

 Officially Mrs Lim. :')

ROM Preparation

Actually there's nothing much to prepare for ROM.

I settle for something which I wanted; a pool garden theme! ^.^

ROM is only for our immediate family. I've sent in appeal to allow my Uncle to come in to Singapore to join us and I'm seriously crossing my fingers hoping that they can approve that. =( **Please Please Please**

He's my only Uncle and he's just like my father. So I hope he can be here to witness my happiness and give me his blessing personally on this special day.

Counting down to ROM, 9 more days!

Things which we have done so far:

1. Gown and suit fitting
2. Booked venue
3. Reserved JP
4. Filed marriage
5. Ring pillow and pen arrived
6. Wedding Shoes for both of us 
7. ROM documents verification
8. Hair "Grooming"
9. Hand bouquet, pre-ordered. =) 
10. Groom's corsage, pre-ordered. =) 

Things to be done: 

1. Wedding band, to be done by this week. 
2. Manicure and Pedicure, to be done by this week. 

More or less done! We have somehow or rather adopted Xiaobai. She's kind of part of the family now. Growing up so fast that it's so scary. She was barely a month when she came over and now she's two months old and took her first vaccination already. 

Xiaobai and her toy at about one month old. LOL

Two months old with her raw bite and socks. HAHA.

Momsie bought her the bed and collar that comes with a leash and she loves them! 

Sometimes I feel, getting married can bring a couple closer together or it can break them apart. Because sometimes when I'm preparing all the weddings stuffs, doing all the researches and liaising with different people yet have to juggle my work at the same time, the stress level is something I've never experienced. Even though work has it's own level of stress but planning wedding, it's a totally different thing. 

As I am aware of how important wedding is to me, well okay, it's important but not that important. To a lot of people, getting means having an official status as "wife". As important as people sees it, it's not the official status I want. I just want us to be happy. I've mentioned to Love before I don't mind us not getting married, staying together, being together and happily ever after. Haha. People must be thinking "stupid woman why want to do this to herself?" Well, because I can. Because to me, marriage doesn't mean happily ever after. Yes, it's once in a lifetime. But it doesn't guarantee happiness. I know what I want for us. I want us to be happy and us being together again is already a huge miracle which I'm happy about. I'm contented to be with the man whom I love with my life. And knowing that he loves me just as much is good enough. People may say I'm silly, I'm dumb and ridiculous. Well, this is my life, you can have your opinions and views but I don't care. Yes, I'm stubborn like this. And I like that I'm stubborn. Stubbornness has been a good and bad thing for me. But I still like me being stubborn. =p 

So if I can choose, I would rather not get married, just be together happily and live our lives being silly and happy. Hahahaha. Or maybe just go to Barcelona and get married there, just the two of us. Lol. But I can't do so I have to deal with this. As much as I want to get things over and done with, it wouldn't be over until next year October. Well well well. I can do this! 

Half way there already and I gotta admit that the initial stage really is a big headache cause too many options and choices and Love is so 'chin chai' until I'm so annoyed! But after I told him how I felt things got better. Hahahaha! Quite often I was so annoyed and pissed off that all I wanted to do was to call off the wedding. Cause to me, getting married and preparing for wedding makes us unhappy and that's not what I want! If getting married and preparing for wedding is the root of our unhappiness, I don't want it. That's why getting married is not exactly that important to me compared to other girls. Being together happily is what is more important to me. A piece of paper will not make me happy. 

But well, I'm glad things got better after I told Love how I felt. Cause I think it's important that we both lay our cards on the table, being all honest and truthful in this relationship, that's what I want. And I know this man, will do all it takes to never lie to me. Because he loves me this much. To him, I'm that important that he can forgo his friends. Haha. Well, of course I don't need him to do that cause most of his friends are mine. We have too many common friends. Lol. 300+ friends in common since secondary school days, what else can I say/do right? Haha.  We have too many things in common already..

Seemingly in this relationship, Love has been the giving in party while I'm the taking in party. I don't deny, because that's true. Love give in a lot to me because he don't want to argue with me. Well, not exactly argue, more like bicker. HAHA. But I also won't deny that I love to disturb him just to see his reactions. =P Like I will tell him once in a while that I will 離家出走 and go back to my place and he will be like ' Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo ' and I'll start laughing like some crazy woman. hahaha. Okay our own inside jokes. Hmm.  Anyway he gives in to me most of the time and I know it's because he doesn't want me to be unhappy. He hates all kinds of arguments with me and he will try his best to stop all of them as soon as he can though sometimes he have his temper and would go mad too. But MOST of the time, he gives in.. But well, having said that, I do give in to him also okay.. just not MOST of the time. =P Because I love to be pampered by him and he pampers me too much. LOL. 

Anyway, 9 more days to being a MRS. Am I nervous now, nope. Because I'll be on that day itself. LOL. I don't usually feel nervous until the very last minute. Horrible woman, I know. But my dearest fiance somewhat inculcated this habit to me, take my own sweet time. -.- HAHA okay, I should improve on that. 

Now that almost everything is settled, I hope to have ample rest until next weekend. I don't want to look like some zombie in the morning when I go and meet my MUA at the Bridal Shop. 

MRS LIM, kind of not used to it. Love tested it on me and I felt so alien to that. I guess it takes time. =) Love has started telling people that I'm his 太太 and having to hear him say that over the phone, it sounded quite weird. LOL.