No One Else But YOU.

Welcome to my world, where alcohol numbs all emotions.

I've not drunk text anyone in years. Not even to my recent ex. But I did that to you. I almost drunk dial you. And I almost teared. This shows how much I miss you and I guess I don't have to say anything more. :( So yes, you mean a lot a lot to me and I believe it's not just a one or two days thing that I have this strong feeling for you. This feeling has always been there, never left. Somehow I figured that I've been trying to force myself or convince myself that I don't feel for you for the past few years which indeed I failed miserably. :( We can't control how we feel, maybe at some point I managed to curb my feelings for you but I doubt it's entirely. Because I can never love another the way I loved/love you. This feeling is now too strong to hold back or curb anymore.. :( What am I to do now.... Sigh.

My weekend was spent being so really busy with work due to some problems. I foresee more coming to me now since this is gonna be more and more shit. :( Well, I know I can do this! :) 加油 Kat! 

Other than working, I spent it with my family cause it's Mom's birthday tomorrow and we spent the whole day with her today to S.E.A Aquarium. We will be heading to Adventure Cove next week. :) Darling girl was out today as a surprise for momsie and indeed she got surprised! :) And the dolphins are out already! I'm so happy!!! They're so adorable! ^.^ The day was great! After having to wake up early in the morning at 730am to settle work stuffs and cooking mee sua for momsie and family, now I'm really tired.. :( Gonna take a shower and head to bed. 

Anyway, side track.. I met up with someone lately and was told about some stuffs. Stuffs which I've expected and knew will be happening. Chances of you blaming me for this failed relationship and all kinds of nasty things that you're going to put across to your side of people, I expected all these because your ego is high. Way to high to even tell anyone what you've done to me.. All those rules and regulations that you set and things you said to me or did to me.. Will you even come clean with everything? No you won't. Because of your ego and pride. I don't blame you for your character being like this because I've known you well enough to know that somehow it was your parents who in some ways spoilt you. Being the only son at home and maybe your parents dotes on you that's why they spoilt you without knowing they did. I don't blame them either. End of the day it was you.. You could have learn by yourself if you have been through a really tough life. But somehow I feel, your life haven't been tough enough. Your life have not been tough enough to let you learn. I suppose you need to have a hard fall in order to learn but I hope your fall will not be that bad to not let you stand up again. You haven't tasted the worse phase of your life whereas I did. I wish you the best of your life and I hope you can learn to be yourself when you're facing other people because too much of faking yourself can hurt yourself so much. Though hiding might be a good way to not let people hurt you but hiding too much can make you become a person you're not. And I hope your lesson will befall on you soon enough to let you grow up and mature. As much as I want to hate you for being such a coward when it comes to this relationship, I guess I can't do that. I'm angry with you for being such a loser because you only listen to your friends, yes this has never and will never change. I will never change my impressions of your friends anymore. What they've done and said, I wish karma befall on them for the rest of their live. I've never done anything to hurt them but the way they choose to hurt me and bring me down, I hope karma never let them off easily because they deserve a good treatment from karma. Karma is watching them all, now is not the best time to find them but sooner or later, karma will find them. And I hope when karma do find them, it's gonna be so bad for them that it will torture them both mentally and physically, far worse than what I've gotten. Because karma is a bitch. 

My life has been moving on well.. Things have been going well as well even though not all things go the way I want them to be but surely, all will fall into places as time goes by. I'm sure. :)